Bucky with both short term and long term memory issues, tho:
- Keeping notebooks with detailed notes for himself, not just on recovered memories but about things he’s learned recently. He has three separate pages dedicated to “movies I like”, “movies I didn’t like”, “DO NOT WATCH AGAIN FOR FUCK’S FUCKING SAKE”.
- Rereading the same stack of shitty mysteries over and over because he forgets whodunnit.
- Getting frustrated with board games because he can’t keep the rules or the game state clear in his head; by the time they circle around to his turn he’s blanked on his strategy. He covers by either playing on his phone or cheating blatantly and outrageously – fronting like he never cared in the first place.
- Checking. Everything. Constantly. His keys are permanently glued to his left front pocket, his wallet on the right, and he shoves his hands in his jeans nine times a minute to make sure his stuff’s still there. When he can’t find one of his important items, he freaks until he can pat himself down.
- Feeling awkward around new people because he sometimes spaces their names and has to pick them up again from conversation. He’s gotten good at asking his friends to come over and introduce themselves so he can eavesdrop what New Person’s name is all over again.
- Constantly throwing out leftovers because once food goes into the fridge he doesn’t remember that it exists. He has to set up a weekly alarm on his phone to clean moldy dim sum out.
- Tracking his life on an oversize wall calendar, not only appointments but small goals for himself too. He writes a list each day of the small things he’d like to accomplish and writes down a note about how it went. That way he can look back and see how far he’s come.
Tag: tw ptsd
Captain America: The Winter Soldier Audio Commentary:
“We always wanted to approach Sam through the prism of being a fellow veteran, someone who could speak to Steve on that level as opposed to in awe of him because he’s Captain America. Also it brought the idea that Steve, in addition to everything else he’s gone through, spent 4 years in WWII. That’s very traumatic stuff. And he has never had a chance to decompress about any of it.
This is probably the hardest scene in the movie because it leads to one of the the biggest buys in the film: that Cap is gonna go back to the guy he met jogging on the Mall when his life is in danger because he’s the only guy he can trust. So it’s important that these two connect on a very deep and emotional level in this scene.”
writing trauma & survival: a Marvel primer
After several months of reading and writing in Marvel fandom, I decided that I wanted to write a primer on trauma from the perspective of being a trauma survivor and coming from a disability studies background. You might be interested in the stuff in here if you’re writing about Bucky post-CATWS, Sam’s counseling practice, or the experiences of any number of Marvel characters. I’m drawing on a variety of articles, zines, and books, all of which are available to read online or download.